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It's only the sixth and Bilbo officially already hates the Christmas season. There's only so many times he can listen to Fili and Kili sing Ding Dong Merrily On High out of tune before he brains himself on the coffee table.
Part 5 of Babysitter!AU
“I’m not the stupid one- you know why? Because you were the one who came up with the idea of soaking Thrandy’s clothes in gasoline while they were drying on the line.” “I didn’t know they were going to have a barbeque in the backyard, did I? What am I, psychic?” “The whole washing line set on fire, Kili.” “Oh, shut up and help me up.” They both managed to scramble to their feet before slowly opening the door and peering out of the supply closet they’d been hiding in. A bright light shone over their faces, blinding them, and someone cleared their throat before speaking out. “Evening, gentlemen.” Fili looked up at the security guard. “Oh, shit.”
Part 6 of Babysitter!AU
Bilbo tries to be romantic, but he needs a little help from his friends.
From the conversation between linguisticparadox and linddzz: “‘Hmmm! it smells like elves!’ thought Bilbo.” Wait. What. What exactly does an elf…smell like…. This raises so many questions! -Does Bilbo sniff around for elves like some weird hobbity bloodhound? -Do hobbits have extra sensitive senses of smell and do they use this to find mushrooms and truffles? (answer is obviously yes)-Nevermind what do elves smell like how does Bilbo KNOW what elves smell like-good thing he didn’t say this out loud. I can just imagine the looks the company would have given him if Bilbo sniffed the air and declared “it smells like elves!” in that cheerful hobbit way of his-hobbits are creepy So in this fic Bilbo DOES say it aloud, and Thorin's been dwelling on it like a broody dork ever since. Cue the (happy!) end of the Quest and Thorin simply HAS to know.
Bilbo liked Erebor, he really did. Even if everyone seemed convinced he was going to leave. In which soil causes international incidents, Thorin is over-dramatic, and dwarves are rubbish at keeping secrets. Oh, and they build a garden. Eventually.
Whilst the rest of the Company enjoy the feasting and festivities of Lake-town, poor Bilbo is still laid up with that terrible cold from the barrel incident. Thorin takes some time out to check on him.